january to july...
...hard to believe that we are in july already. time is flying right by.
...hard to believe that we are just a few days shy of 6 months since tim passed.
...hard to believe that some days are not any easier now than they were 6 months ago.
some of us mind the loneliness...but that is NOT to imply that some of us ALWAYS want company.
some of us mind the family outings and all the tim stories...but that is NOT to imply that we should STOP the memories or the funny stories (some just need to deal with that stuff differently than others).
some of us seem to be coping just fine and wonder why the others aren't...but someday down the road some of us may find a day that becomes hard for no apparent reason and then realize...some days are just plan sucky.
but overall i would say that we have pulled through these last 6 months fairly well...i think we have become a much closer knit family...with increased communication...which i for one think is rather ODD due to the fact that i live with three teenage daughters...but i also think it is awesome and consider myself one really lucky mom. i pray every single day that we can get through this "rough spot" in our lives and still be able to maintain a stable family (which may be a stretch considering we weren't too stable before) AND a family who still has the faith and assurance that GOD won't give us anything that we can't handle together and with HIS help.
one day at a time.
well...the last blog promised a comparison of driving with teens and cedar point...unfortunately that blog is still in the process of being written so stay tuned...hopefully later this week.
kelsey and i are painting a portion of the kitchen today...kinda scary.
ashley and john have offered to mow the grass...kinda awesome.
megan is working...kinda priced some college books this week-ouch!
(hi ho hi ho its off to work she goes...)
thanks for checking in
tammy
posted by tdewalt @ 10:22 AM
3 Comments:
Stable?! You aren't trying to stand out among the rest of us, are ya? Stable... I love that. :)
Deb
Thanks for the journey with you. I think you are doing a great job. I also know that having been there that when you least expect it something will grabyou from the past. God is the one constant source you can count on. Fred Culver
Remember when this was all fresh and you just lived daily with the pain?
...You'd climb a ways up from that "void" and then something (a song, a bill, a realization) would knock you back down. But it wasn't very far to fall, so the pain was not so shocking.
Then, as time goes by and you climb farther up from the 'black hole' of loss and vacancy, something (a picture, a date, a smell) knocks you back down, but now you have much farther to fall, so the pain is surprising in its strength.
It makes sense---if that's what you want to call it; because when one is IN pain, more pain is just a measure or degree. Whereas, when one has "less pain" or even "painless" days, the jarring effect of unsuspected assaults on one's heart takes the breath away.
Even now...30 years later...it still happens every now and then.
Surprising? Not to me. I always think that the level of hurt one feels at the loss is commensurate with the love that existed/exists!
Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.
Love,
Aunt Katie
Post a Comment
<< Home