october 27th

as hard as i tryed to stop this blog and write my farewell entry i just couldn't bring myself to do it before the "dreaded" birthday blog. as many of you know i am a huge fan of the fall and the winter seasons...many of you thought it was just because i LOVE the cold weather but just between you and me i think it all stemmed from the fact that as of OCTOBER 27th each year i was NO LONGER OLDER than tim...he would always catch up to me each fall and i could enjoy a few months of not having to hear about me being a year older than him.

today WE would both be 48 years old...

for him...way too young to be gone
for me...way too young to be a widow

i never was a huge fan of birthdays but tim just loved them!!! he loved his birthday and my birthday and the kids birthdays...he was such a "big kid" when it came to gifts and cakes and candles and all the fun stuff associated with birthdays.

i have to admit i am still not a huge fan of birthdays...and today was kinda a downer day. not that i don't think of him and miss him every single day of my existence but today i found that it was extremely hard to stay upbeat.

ashley has been struggling today also...and after work a very good friend stopped by and had a nice visit with her...thanks EB for listening to that tug on your heart and stopping by the house today. i can't begin to tell you how much it meant to her to see you today. we all deal with our grief differently and for her...a visit from you on her dad's birthday meant the world.

for me the birthday is only the first hurtle...the wedding anniversary is right around the corner.

thanks for checking in

sorry i don't blog as often...this full time working single mom is exhausted.

tammy

ps...only appropriate that the first game of the world series would start today.

hello

yes...i am still alive

megan called to remind me that tonight is the LAST TIME that i can say that i am the parent of 3 teenagers...as of FRIDAY, OCT 15th she will no longer be a teenager...hard to believe that she will be 20 years old.

*****************HAPPY BIRTHDAY MEG*********************
we have been a bit sporadic on the blog lately...i am getting really close to putting out my farewell blog entry. it is harder and harder for me to make the time to say what i want to say...

i could go on and on and on about this parent that had a heart cath or that parent that had a heart cath or that daughter that got yet her third concussion and is back at the clinic or my success's and failures at having a virtual trainer or the college search for TWO high school seniors or how excited i am that the one in college applied for an international study abroad semester...

i sit down to post an entry and my head just spins...so for now i just say HI and thanks for checking in. i will give some more thought to the future of this site and i will get back to you all soon.

enjoy this fall weather and have a great weekend.

tammy