the line is out...

for the first time since january tim will be taking a shower without PRESS AND SEAL. (every single day we have had to cover his line with press and seal and tape to keep it dry). they removed his central line on friday and all went well. there was a small portion of the clot that came out with the line and they feel that the remaining portion of the clot will just be absorbed by the vessel wall. ? (hopefully...but if he experiences ANY sort of chest pain he is to go immediately to the closest ER) so far so good. they tend to tell us "stuff" that makes us crazy lately...and if not crazy we certainly are in CONSTANT PRAYER>


as you all are aware...we are in the midst of a HUGE transition phase with regards to tims treatment. we thought it would be a very CUT AND DRY decision but we have found that it is the fartherest thing from a yeah or nay. our kids are asking us EVERY SINGLE DAY whether or not we made our FINAL decicion yet...i guess in a sense we have made a decision but it would be very hard to say that it is the FINAL DECISION>

as of right now...tim is no longer doing the chemotherapy treatments. his central line has been removed and we are done in the day hospital. he is on his own with making sure he drinks enough and eats enough. he is still on ALL his same medications to get him through from day to day. (yes, he still has that huge pile of pills every morning and that little pile of pills and that ugly heparin shot every night). he will still get blood work every 7-10 days in the outpatient lab to monitor his stuff.

he is planning on going golfing this afternoon and to the beach tomorrow. (thank you ed and andy)

each day post chemo he feels a bit better...and a lot stronger. in about 3 weeks we will meet with our "regular" oncology doctor (he has been off work for a bit...his 60 year old wife recently passed away from cancer-talk about seeing things from both sides of the fence). that is when we will hash out all the details of tims future in a bit more detail. find out if there is any alternative treatments available and stuff like that.

so...for now we enjoy the energy that he is getting back and we hang out with our kids and we walk the boardwalk and we watch the sunset and we enjoy the ocean and we eat maryland crabs and grotto pizza.

thanks for checking in

tim and tammy

mid-week update...

...did you ever feel that you were running and running and running but were not getting anywhere??? we seem to be caught in one of those cycles that keep going round and round.

we did get the results back from the CT scan of the clot...the clot is growing!?!? not exactly what we were expecting, although sometimes i wonder why we even try to guess anymore. the verdict is stilll not in as to whether to pull out the central line or not. apparently the clot is attached to a vessel that runs right next to the central line and "maybe" if they pull the line they can remove the clot as well. we should know about that tomorrow (thursday).

it is official...we are heading to the beach for a few days early next week. thanks to all of you that have inquired and offered your help in finding us a place to stay...it was very much appreciated. (thanks to harold and delores for offering their home but maybe another time-prayers go out for your back surgery next week) thanks to all.

our peace and quiet is about to be over...we head back to e-town in the morning to pick up the field hockey girls. ashley is still in berwick. (probably eating homemade ice cream at a carnival about right now)

thanks for checking in

tim and tammy

by the time...

...most of you are reading this in the morning we will be at the hospital for tims CT scan. yes, for some unknown reason they scheduled us for a 6:30am visit (yuk). i might at least get some breakfast out of it. (you guessed it...one pancake and two eggs). this CT scan is to check on the blood clot status. hopefully the shots are dissolving the clot and it will be no problem.

we are still unsure of our "get-a-way" status. it will depend a bit on what the scan shows. i have to work on tuesday and friday and then have a week off. we are still planning on a couple of days away...but we are both wishing the heat wave would chill. i am ready for november.

all quiet at the dewalt house...megan and kelsey are at field hockey camp and ashley went to spend some quality time with nana and pop pop. we used to really look forward to time alone but now it seems kinda odd without all the noise and commotion. i actually watched an entire movie without getting up to do laundry!!! i guess tim and i could TRY to play ROCK BAND but that could be VERY SCARY. could send the neighbors running.

well...gotta get up early.

thanks for checking in.

tim and tammy

requested delay...

because tim is starting to feel human again and we still have not made our final decision on treatment we have requested a short delay. he was supposed to go in tomorrow to start round #6 of chemo but we have put that on hold for the time being.

this will be the first time in a LONG time that he actually feels good enough to try to get away for a few days...monday of next week he has a scheduled CT scan to check on that blood clot and then once they make a decision on whether or not they have to pull his central line we should be free for a few days.

we are starting to look for a few "inexpensive " days at the beach somewhere during the prime season...wish us luck. food shouldn't be too expensive...everyday of the week tim eats one pancake and two fried eggs!!!! (i am just not sure if the capital diner can live without him for a few days).

thanks for all your thoughts and prayers during this very difficult decision-making time. we have been round and round and round then we start over and go round again. keep praying for wisdom and guidance.

well...today i have to get the kids to the church for a city-outreach project week. they are living at our church all week and working with habitat for humanity today and other churches in a very large and very awesome outreach ending with a huge block party in the city on saturday. it is a very hard-working week that is very good for the kids (2/3rds of my kids LOVE IT...1/3rd is going under protest-oh well).

we will be in touch...

thanks for checking in.

tim and tammy

still have questions...

...as of right now we are "unofficially" going in for another round of chemo the end of this week.

our doctor is off for a bit so we are going to try and meet with the doctor that is covering. in the past 3 years we have had this doctor many times and we are very comfortable with him and we value his advise also. so hopefully we will be able to ask him the questions we have and get at least an idea of where this new information on the PET scan will take us.

tims labs looked good today and he is actually feeling pretty decent these last couple of days.

we are very patiently trying to dissolve that blood clot just outside his heart...

we are very patiently trying to get answers to our many questions...

we are very patiently trying to figure out why our stove top works and our oven doesn't...i am still trying to find a recipe for microwave "baked" macaroni and cheese. thanks to the neighbors who helped us out.

just another day in the life of the dewalts...

my week vacation is over and i head back to work in the morning. wasn't exactly the best vacation week i have had but it was better than some. i got to hersheypark and a concert and two cookouts. got to spend time with the kids...except for a few trips to the day hospital (remember the short leash) tim stayed out of trouble. (no unexpected admissions or fevers or other major issues-except occasional need to freak me out with these random blood clots).

we will update when we have any news.

thanks for checking in.

have a great day!!!

tim and tammy

what we know...

it is 1am and i just got home from a magnificent concert...the piano man. i drug a 15 year old with me and i think there were times she actually enjoyed it. i saw her singing and dancing and laughing in the aisles...it was great. i am still trying to figure out why someone would take the time to memorize the words to "we didn't start the fire"...let alone many thousands of people...but it was awesome hearing everyone (except me) sing along. i did know the words to the piano man and that was amazing.

well...today was the day that we heard back from the PET scan. we were totally prepared for the scan coming back with bad news and we were totally prepared for the scan coming back with good news. but somehow we were not quite ready for it coming back with mediocre news. i cannot give you all the details tonight but the short of it is that some of the tumors are still present and showing "hot spots". this means that the cancer is still there...but it also shows that many of those tumors have shrunk in size since january so they concluded that the chemo is working (a bit).

i was alone when i heard the news and the nurse told me that the scan was really not that bad and that it could have been a lot worse (infact she admitted that she expected it to be a lot worse) but for some reason when i got off the phone and thought of having to tell tim that they want to start him on more of the same chemo i just cryed. i can't even begin to tell you how sorry i feel for that man. we still haven't made our final decision yet...we really haven't been together alone to discuss it much yet. there are many other factors that are coming into play also...

tonight he called me just before the concert and told me that he forgot to tell me that he has a blood clot forming around his port (which is located right next to his heart)...we have to go back on the lovenox injections to try to dissolve it and they are going to do a CT scan next week and see if they need to pull his central line.

we are 6 weeks post-chemo and his counts have started to drop again...kinda wierd i thought.

there is some "activity" with the vocal cords that we are unclear as to what that means.

we still have to meet with the doctors next week and have a heart to heart again. as of right now he is looking at more chemo next thursday if we choose to continue. i am not sure of all the details and all the reasons why they want him back on the same chemo next week but we will start asking questions next week and find out what they are thinking. then we will decide which direction we are going to go...keep praying.

so...the scan was sorta good i guess. i was unclear as to the number of tumors and if any of the "hot spots" were new since january. more questions to ask. a weekend to ponder and make up our questions list.

hope that all made sense...i haven't been getting a lot of sleep and right now i am going on fumes.

thanks for checking in

tim and tammy

still waiting...

haven't heard back on the scan yet...maybe today.

could that be a good sign?

could that be a bad sign?

could it mean absolutely nothing?

who knows...maybe they just love torturing people.

just trying to keep busy and not dwell on it.

thanks for checking in

tim and tammy

monday update...

...not too exciting.

we did have a WONDERFUL 4th of JULY holiday. tim was feeling up for a few short little adventures and although got very tired afterwards...he really enjoyed himself. he actually was able to walk around hersheypark for a bit on friday. he was craving a slice of the park pizza so we hiked all the way to the back of the park for a slice of pizza and fries. (we forgot how many hills are in that park). then after the park we headed over to his cousin's house in palmyra for a picnic and a mean bean bag toss tournament. (those guys take their bean bag game serious...and i believe that ashley was able to claim fame along with her partner craig II).

on saturday we drove to berwick for another cook-out and my nephews baby is absolutely adorable!!!! no bean bags there...but they play an intense game of bocce ball and hillbilly golf!!! by sunday morning tim was toast and was willingly going back to the hospital for more fluids to help build him back up.

his biggest challenge is trying to lay off the carbs yesterday and today. he has a PET scan in the morning and he is to watch his carb intake...i am not sure how many of you are aware but carbs is ALL he eats these days and so we are struggling a bit.

we keep playing out each senerio in our heads...what if the scan shows this and what if the scan shows that...i guess we will not really know what we are going to do until we get the results and talk to the doctors. pray that we will have the wisdom to make the right decisions and the peace to live with the decision we make!!!

we have decided that it is time to do what is best for tim. yes, we need to factor in the wife and the kids but actually the wife and the kids have talked and we want what is best for tim also. everyone has their opinion and their advice and most of it makes perfect sense...but no one has had to endure what tim has had to endure these past 3 years so we are taking everything into consideration and will pick a course of action that is ultimately best for our family. we feel that this a huge crossroads in our lives and would appreciate all the prayers in our direction as we make our decision.

so...whether we go with more of the same chemo or a reduced dosage of the same chemo or a different chemo or no chemo...the decision will have been made based on a multitude of factors-and the decision will have been bathed in prayer.

once we hear back from the doctors on the PET scan results and have some time to decide which direction we are going to go-we will let you all know.

we are still praying for a miracle...we haven't given up and never will stop praying for a miracle.

thanks for checking in.

tim and tammy

thanks go out to the gals (and guys?) at pepsi that coordinated the bake sale...man, talk about carbs!!! who ate all that stuff?? thank you SO MUCH. everything you do is so appreciated!!

happy 4th of july

i almost hate to take a chance and jinx myself...but i think this is going to be the first holiday weekend in a LONG time that tim is not an in-patient. he goes in to the day hospital this afternoon and again on sunday...but he will have friday AND saturday off. this is exciting. our tenative plans are to hang around here on friday and head to berwick on saturday. hopefully all will work out. my nephew had a baby a couple weeks back and we have yet to hold the little guy...i hear that he is ADORABLE.

today was "supposed" to be the day that we went in for another round of chemo...so i have some unexpected time off...this will be nice.

on tuesday next week tim is scheduled for a PET SCAN which is a scan specific for finding "hot spots" which indicate in tims case-the lymphoma tumors. the last scan was done in january and since then he has had 5 rounds of chemo-it is now time to see how he is doing on the inside.

this will be a BIG decision making week for us-keep us in your prayers.

have a GREAT HOLIDAY WEEKEND....

thanks for checking in.

tim and tammy

ps...thank you mary (and doug) you guys are awesome!!!!